For some reason I feel compelled to explain myself a bit. Sometimes I look back at things I say or write and I say "me why did you say or write that?". Part of it is my perhaps offbeat sense of humor and part of it is a manifestation of my frustrations (i.e. I'm venting). For instance my last article, you should notice it's full of a lot of frustration, emotion and opinion. This is what I like to call Bill Raw. Bill Raw is different from Inspired Bill. Perhaps you can start to see why this post is aptly titled? :)
Seriously, though, I'd much rather be taken seriously when I discuss something God is teaching me or someone else, rather then when I vent. I considered deleting the previous posting, but I can't continue to censor myself. I'm an opinionated, intense, frequently frustrated man. Should I apologize for this? Only when it becomes sinful.
Well I hope to get back into my usual more faith based postings. Perhaps after I get a better handle on what God is currently showing me? I feel much of it has to do with learning to trust more in Him and learning to focus on others over myself. That is I should put the "little" things I could, or rather should, do for others at a higher level of importance in my life. God willing more to come on this soon.
5 comments:
Yeah... it sounded pretty frustrated. I think one of the reason's I'm not all that attracted to blogging is because I'm nervous about writing something that I might later regret, which, of course is a severe handicap on writing anything at all worth reading.
Oh, yeah. Mell Got me a Munchkin expansion for Valentines Day. I used one of the blank cards to make a BILL LINTON monster, but you'll have to come down and play to see it ;).
That's interesting that you say that because I've often thought of shutting this blog down for the very same reason. However, if I did that then I wouldn't keep myself open to some of the accountability I've received as a result of it. I realize I have more then enough pride to concern God and He will continue to work on me in this area until I learn more humility.
Pride is the worst cancer of the soul in humanity and so it's the most difficult, most time consuming and most painful to remove and only God can remove it fully. If this stupid little blog gives God yet another conduit into my heart (whether through using others or just by using His spirit to convict me) and if there is any benefit to my spiritual walk by writing to it, then I'll continue to post my thoughts, warts and all.
I've also thought about making this blog exclusive or not allowing anyone to read it, but then what's the point? I can ponder my thoughts myself with no other perspectives? If I want to become more Christlike then I have to be willing to put my prideful butt on the line to occassionally be kicked.
I also agree with you about the handicap in writing. Fortunately or unfortunately life is really only worth living, and interesting, when we take risks. This is the only way relationships grow and we can experience a beauty and joy which would otherwise elude us. Playing it safe and never being vulnerable is safe, but it's also very boring and pushes others away.
If becoming a fool before men makes me humble before my Lord and brings me more real joy and peace, then may I be the king of fools.
2 Samuel 6:21-22
zzzzzzzz....
when's your next post, Bill?
Hmm... I think I've found a pattern possibly. That is that when I'm going through a trial, especially an out of work trial, I have nothing to say. Perhaps I'm humbled and posting my thoughts on here is really arrogance on my part? Perhaps I'm too angry with God and I'm feeling uninspired? Perhaps I feel like everything else in my life really doesn't amount to much while I'm going through this trial of unemployment? The only thing I know for sure is that I don't have much on my mind which I feel is suitable to share with just anyone.
Having a blog opens me up to criticism and I accept that, however I don't feel like being criticized right now. I don't feel like sharing some of my darker thoughts and opening myself up to the insensitive, self-righteous and arrogant folks which may use the opportunity to lift themselves up at my expense.
I have nothing humorous or "safe" enough to share. If I feel so inspired I will write something. For now I will keep my thoughts more to myself. Hopefully when things are going better in my life I will start to write again?
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